Sometimes I take photos of myself … well I know we all take photos of ourselves lol but sometimes I take photos of myself and I am actually surprised at what they look like. Sometimes its a welcome surprise and other times its not.

But all the time I am me … right?

What does that look like…? You know I never really feel like I care about what I look like until I have a moment where I don’t like what I see. So what is that about?

The most beautiful people look exactly how they feel. This is my opinion of course. But think about this… if you just look at a person and they are so genuinely happy they look happy. That’s a simple example.

But then when it comes to what’s beautiful well that’s another story because beauty is a judgement call. Based on standards. What are yours? What are mine? My standards of myself are quite harsh if I’m honest. And then this is when I don’t like what I see. And I think… well I don’t like that because that is not what I feel like I look like.

Well this is what I want to start asking myself… is it what I feel like? Because if I care for myself and I feel healthy and calm inside I will look like that surely. If everything is connected… why isn’t it that simple? Surely it is. How you feel on the inside is how you will look on the outside.

Today I had a moment of overwhelm in a public place. I cried on a bridge. I just felt so bad inside, I knew I looked it as well because it was affecting the way that people were feeling around me, and I had to get it out. I released what I was feeling on the inside so that it wouldn’t affect the way I looked on the outside. This is how I see it now.

Hmm… this thought feels incomplete but for now I will just leave it at this.

“What do I feel like?” How I feel is how I look.

Talk soon,

B-