I am working on an article about Pluto in Capricorn, which I am really excited about. But I realize it might take me some time so I decided to share a bit today anyway, to keep my daily commitment to showing up and writing or speaking or updating my website.

This week has been … deep and transformative and overwhelming. A couple of nights ago I could barely stay up past 7pm. Protection.

Last night around the same time, all I could do was cry. And cry really really hard. I wanted so badly to keep crying until I got to the bottom of what I was crying about. I wanted to feel the worst I could possibly feel. I wanted to know that that was the worst I could possibly feel and it couldn’t get any worse.

What I experienced, however, was that as I continued leaning into the grief and sadness and anger and emotion, it continued to expand. This was a part of my fear… that if I let myself feel it I would stay stuck in it forever.

But it actually wasn’t that. It was the realization that these feelings were expanding because they had been contracted. For a long time I think. A really long time.

So now what I feel to be true is that I won’t be stuck in it forever if I allow myself to feel it, I will expand into the feelings until they transform or complete themselves naturally.

I wish to embody this logical reframe: by not allowing myself to feel the feelings I actually AM stuck in them indefinitely.

Thank you, life, for this wisdom. May continued experience soothe my soul and mend my heart.

I love you.