#SundayStories Where you’ve been and where you’re going

Mentor. Tribe.

These things have been on my head for a long time to be honest. I have been wanting them to come to fruition for me. Everyone keeps talking about finding your tribe and I just am like … why haven’t I found mine yet? I know that I have a lot of people in my life who I love and who love me. Who I can count on and who are a part of my life for different reasons, mostly cuz of who they are. But there is something about the word tribe. The concept of finding your tribe… something about that just seems different.

It’s not just having your family and liking them. Or finding friends and liking them. Or even finding a love and loving that person. I just don’t think it’s the same.

Finding your tribe seems to me to be like finding people who support and also live in what you live in.

Tribe … your tribe is your soul collective.

Where is mine? I can’t help but wonder. And then I went to a talk today where the theme was exploration of indigenous culture and I just listened to these people talk about how they live their culture and associate with their culture. How big a part of their lives it is and how they appreciate the ability to share it.

One thing really stuck out to me – they all have a tribe. And their tribe is not just the people who they were born into, but it happens to be that they also chose to continue to be a part of that tribe because they all seem to flow with one another.

And I think because of that – each of the presenters… also found that they could include each other in their tribe.

So this is to do with your soul’s purpose. Isn’t it? Your tribe.

I don’t think I have found mine. Do you have to be clear about what your about before you can find your tribe? I don’t know. But what I do know is that whatever I tell myself is that either frees or restricts me in my perception of my reality.

I remember reading once (on instagram – idilionaire) – that our reality never changes – it is always the same. And that it is how we feel inside that colors our perception of our reality.

So I thought to myself this morning – I really need more time for silence in my life. Silence to receive the answers. Because there are some universal truths that we all know. Our souls collectively know them. And I think that if I can find out what mine are – and live them truly and authentically – then I will attract my tribe and they will attract me.

The next thing – mentor. GODDDDDD when I was a child and even still to this day I would have daydreams of someone just seeing something in me. Wanting to invest in me and teach me what they knew of their expertise. Of course it woudl be an expertise that I was pursuing as well. WHen I was young it was always in Irish dance. Someone would just see my hard work, passion and dedication. Someone would appreciate my skill and someone would take it upon themselves to push me to my fullest potential.

I found the opposite for a lot of my life so far in a lot of different areas. I have always pushed myself. I haven’t ever felt like I had someone else to look to or someone else whom I could converse with in that type of relationship.

I am dying for it. And to be honest with you, the only reason I did without it and still do without it is because I feel I don’t have a choice. But I swear to you if I had a choice I’d have someone by my side always. Because I believe that in order to know where you are going you have to know where you come from.

Who else do you join at the dinner table? Who is seated at the table of your purpose? Who is seated at the table of your perspective on life?

I just wish. I still wish it. That I could come across someone(s) who I can have this relationship with. I have come across a few people so far in my life. But I don’t know. It doesn’t seem as easy to create that kind of a relationship when the person is actually there because it feels like it needs to be mutual.

So far it hasn’t been. So do I need to get clear? I’m not sure.

I know though that I need to get silent. Because I heard the truest statement I’ve heard in a long time today from someone at this talk – in different words – my own words – Basically you need a mentor to teach you where you’ve come from and in doing so then you can consider yourself a true person of the craft you are trying to pursue.

In writing that I am fighting it. But how can I? When you see someone or some thing that is so rich in tradition and culture, how can you fight its existence?

How do we make something novel without knowing what already exists?

Well sometimes I want to and feel like I need to shut myself off from everything to be in my own space and create.

But what happens when I don’t? When i don’t need that? Or when I want something else?

A mentor could be there. A tribe could be there.

Who is your mentor? Who’s in your tribe?

Talk soon,

 

B-

 

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