Candlelight and showers

It has been raining on and off all day. Since I woke at 830 am. In between showers though is the most beautiful sunshine coming through the clouds. This place – Limerick, Ireland – is magical and mysterious.

I’ve been writing so much lately that it is starting to heal me. It’s starting to give me inner peace – the kind that I’ve been after for what feels like lifetimes.

Passing showers are such a beautiful state. Of weather, of being, of living – could all be seen as a passing shower really. But there are times in life, like where I am at right now – where everything feels like a passing shower. Bursts of extremely different activity. Different locations, different atmospheres, different interactions, different people to be with and around.

I’ve been living through passing showers for months now and today I can see the sunshine coming through the clouds. I will be leaving one place and going to another. As this shower clears the sun is guiding my way.

There’s something of value in the idea of things coming in bursts. What does it mean to sustain? Sometimes I think that in order to sustain ourselves, to be here now, to be doing and recreating the same thing – something has to change. Actually I believe this. I really do believe that in order for me to live the constancy of life that I have to be always changing – which is another way of just being here now – always present and receptive to what this very moment brings.

Commit to things and let go of all the rest. In doing so, I believe that we can allow ourselves to be free within our commitments. Of expectations, of past experiences, of responsibilities, of delivering, of being a certain way. Free to just completely be in our commitments. As I write this I read what I am writing and I feel the necessity to remember this because I need it. And I need it to be here. On this white page.

Talk soon

B-

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