With good intentions

Well they say you can’t have your cake and eat it too. You might look at it longingly, fully intending to not eat too much of it, but eat too much of it anyway and maybeeeee get a belly ache.

This happened to me recently. And the belly ache was SO big it nearly cost me something really important to me that I had worked really hard for.

It took me a good few days to even come down from how upset I was about it and then on top of that I had to somehow learn to move forward and forgive myself for my mistake. I think forgiving myself is one of the hardest things I have had to learn to do in this life. Never mind doing it with compassion. So you know how I did it? It happened naturally – I was reminded of something my Aunt told me once when I was younger – about life in general really. She said to me:

If you ever have doubts, remember why you started…

So I started analyzing it, as I do, but instead I shifted my perspective a bit – and I thought – okay why did I do that originally? Where was I coming from?

Sometimes we need to take a minute to see our own perspective ya know? And be sympathetic to it for goodness sakes! I know it doesn’t change what happened, but for me, the ability to understand and be reminded of where I was coming from healed the wound. I was able to stop punishing myself and start forgiving myself. Not everything has to be so SERIOUS and so GRAVE. Sometimes things can be seen through a more playful lens … taking things and holding them lightly.

I was coming from a good place, with a pure heart and good intentions. That realization felt like a big hug. I needed it, for real.

It’s not easy to forgive ourselves. Never mind doing it with compassion. Just remember why you started and it might help you to see a perspective that reminds you of the goodness in your heart. If you always do things with good intentions, you will forgive and be forgiven.

Thoughts for a Monday anyway.

Talk soon

B-

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