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I’ve got sunshine on a cloudy day

I’m pretty positive that I’m a glass half full kinda gal. It’s obviously not an absolute thing, can’t be a ray of sunshine all the time, BUT even if you can’t… there are still days.

Days like today are the definition of sunshine on a cloudy day. Allow me to explain.

I was expecting something to arrive in my inbox. Last night I made a plan in my head that this morning I would wake up to an email that I was expecting. I woke up… nothing. I waited until 12 when I had to leave to meet an old boss for a catch up lunch… nada.

So I decided to try to “let it go” for a while, at least during lunch so I could enjoy it. I think I did that because my lunch date felt like brain food. I learned a few things and picked up a few good tips and I walked out of there itching to grab my journal and write them down. As I was writing I decided… I’m here, it’s Friday, let me enjoy my afternoon.

One of the things I wrote in my journal was this – #1. Stop setting myself up.

Do you ever do that? Set yourself up for something and then end up disappointed because it didn’t go that exact way? I’ve been told that my whole life. That I set myself up for things and I should stop doing it. I wrote that in my journal and then I went off to the National Gallery.

On my way to the NGI, I crossed over a bridge that was lined with little flower pots… Filled with Daffodils. Today is National Daffodil Day in Ireland – in support of cancer research. And I just to happened to stop to smell the roses daffodils. I had to snap a photo ^. I thought about them the whole way to the Gallery.

I love it there, it’s small but it’s perfect in it’s own little way. The best part about it? The gift shop. I could spend hoursssss in there. Needless to say I spent a nice hour in there looking through all of the little goodies. May have spotted my next journal in there! Then I got to a point where I felt like I was nearly ready to go, but one last thing held me in there for a few minutes. It was that journal. I spent an extra few minutes just looking at it and pondering it… and next thing I know I’m ready to go… WITH AN INBOX FULL OF THE EXACT MESSAGE I WAS WAITING FOR!

That set off the rest of my afternoon into ‘efficient mode’ and even though the time frame wasn’t exactly what I thought it would have been… the thing I wanted to get done today still got done.

Soooo… I decided to “stop” setting myself up. And what I realized was that it’s not about the setting yourself up but it’s about HOW you do it. I know now that there is a fine line between setting yourself up for success and setting yourself up for disappointment. SO I’m learning to lean towards the former.

Sunshine. On a cloudy day.

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We need to talk.

^^^ RIGHT THOUGH? Can I get an amen please? I know what you’re thinking. That I’m going to go and rant about how utterly awful that phrase is and what’s worse is usually what comes after it. Well that is all true. But we already know all of that! Usually (more often than not) that phrase introduces a stressful conversation, confrontation of some sort or just a flat out confession – anything to make your stomach turn probably. Not fun. The good news is that since we’ve already got that established we can move on!

Want to know what this phrase means to me… and what I think it should mean? Is that WE NEED TO TALK. We need to talk about stuff! So here is what I think we need to talk about:

  1. We need to talk about our feelings.
    1. Lots of people have it in their head that they need to be strong and can’t talk about how they feel about things. They can’t tell someone they are sad or scared because then they won’t be seen as a strong, successful person. Or they can’t talk about how they feel about happenings that stir emotions in them because they fear their opinion might contrast someone else’s and they will be seen as stupid or uneducated. GET OVER IT.
  2. We need to talk about the sh bad stuff.
    1. Honestly we just need to talk about stuff. We are all people, we all feel sad and happy and angry and desperate etc etc etc. Be those things and say them out loud because that is how you learn, grow and move forward. Crappy things happen, in the world and in our lives. Talk about them. Processing. Most people will find they prefer to process things out loud. So do it. Call your friend, talk to a stranger. Live.
  3. We need to talk about our goals and dreams.
    1. We all have ‘em and I believe that lots of us spend way too much time and energy pushing them away. I have too much to say here so I will leave it at this: Here’s a challenge… Say them out loud, to yourself, your friends, whoever will listen and see how quickly opportunities present themselves towards those goals and dreams.
  4. We need to talk about who we are.
    1. It’s a fun process, you know, going through this life and chasing after opportunities you want to experience. Learning new things, meeting new people, traveling, working in different jobs, getting married, having children, all of it! There is a lot that can be done and a lot to look forward to. Talk about it! You know how you feel about things, you know what you want to do and why you want to do it. All of this is largely to do with who you are. So speak out about it and DO NOT be afraid or ashamed. You are who you are and as soon as you realize that, you will accept yourself and become extraordinary.
  5. We need to talk about what goes on in the world.
    1. So much goes on in the world and if you speak up you can make a difference. Take every chance you get to help progress your world forward. Enough said.

That’s enough of me for the day. #ThoughtsforaThursday

Talk soon!

B-

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So what’s in a job?

How does the word job make you feel? ::cries a little::

I knowwww you know what I’m talking about! Most people do unfortunately. But that is because a job has become a means to an end. It’s something you do to make money so you can have money to live and do the things you want to do. <confusing, boring and a little sad, don’t you think?

Not to mention it’s that little something that you spend at least 1/3 of your day doing, 5 days a week. Just as a means to an end… to have money to spend for those 2 days a week where you feel like you can do what you want.

Well well well, I’m in the process of looking for a job and it had me thinking about all of this. So I’ve decided… I’m going to do what I want. I’m going to make the process even more grueling by searching for jobs that I would genuinely enjoy, jobs that wouldn’t feel like jobs as much as other ones. I’ve also been inspired by an article I read on Linked In yesterday, it was worth a share! And then I decided to procrastinate commit to that idea by expressing it in writing via this lovely post.

I’ve learned a few things along the way so now that I’ve found a few jobs I might actually enjoy more than going to the dentist, allow me to share.

  1. What do you like to do? Pick something you like to do, that you’d like to get paid to do. The catch here though is to make sure that whatever you pick is something you can see as more than a hobby/passion. There can be a fine line, but sometimes when you decide to dive into the nitty gritty of what you love, you fall out of love with it.
    1. I have decided to pursue dancing, in various ways, to achieve my career goals, I don’t mind diving right in and hashing out the details, it doesn’t ruin anything for me. HOWEVER, if I decided to pursue baking and someone tried to tell me how to decorate my cakes… NO WAY, Jose. So thats what I mean.
  2. Why do you want to do it? That seems simple, but it can be so hard to define this aspect of it. I always like to do this because when the going gets tough, remembering why I want to do something in the first place is like a reality check. Why do you want to have that dream job as an artist or a writer? Why do you want to start your own company? Figure it out, write it down and always remember it.
  3. What makes you good at it? Every job application and interview is basically a pitch. You need to be able to pitch yourself to the company, organization, investor, whomever it is and let them know why they need you. Why are you good? What will you bring to the table. Same goes here.. Figure it out, write it down and always remember it.

That’s it honestly, I really meant a few things! I feel like these things are what keep me grounded.

 

An Ode to 20-somethings

We are young and resilient! NOW is the time to travel the world, to make a change, to learn about different cultures and prepare. – Bianca Paige Smith 

It’s a funny thing… being a 20-something. Extended adolescence they say… I think NOT. 30 is the new 20… couldn’t be more wrong. What do “they” know anyway? I swear people forget what it’s like after a few years. Find me any 40/50/60 year old who can genuinely relate to a 20-something by putting themselves back in that place or even better, by imagining what that particular young adult must be going through.

Young adult… a phrase reserved for teens in the later teenage years. WRONG. So wrong. Young adults are 20-somethings. This decade is arguably the most crucial decade of life. And because people pass judgement and call us extended adolescents or say we are overgrown kids, some of the more malleable people of our generation have grown fond of this concept and have decided to throw these years away. AHHHHHH.

The truth is, being a 20-something is freaking hard. It is such an awkward time in this world (the 1st world that is) where we have been fortunate enough to have billions of opportunities and options. Well I’ve got news for everybody… OPTIONS ARE THE ROOT OF ALL EVIL. Too many options? No decisions. “I’ll put it off till I’m 30, after all, 30 is the new 20!”

I had a dog and his name was… WRONG-O. Wrong. That is so wrong.

People need to stop treating 20-somethings like children. **Cue the Peanut Gallery’s public opinion: “Well then you should stop acting like kids and start acting like adults.”

WELLLL… What makes an adult hmm? Do tell because apparently feeling like you are an adult with control over your own matters, a sense of self that is stronger than it’s ever been and set of ambitions/goals to achieve DOESN’T COUNT.

Not unless you are living on your own, paying your own rent and working full time to pay that rent. Sorry… I don’t buy it.

This is the first time in the history of the work world where a 20-something is a MORE VALUABLE candidate for a job than his/her elders. Why is that? Because we are highly educated, very tech savvy, and we have opinions about the world and an ever-optimistic view of how we can improve it.

If you are in your 30s or older, please ask yourself… did you feel that way when you were a 20-something? Or did you just move out because you were told that was the right thing to do… get a job because you needed to pay the bills and put up with the same humdrum just so that you can stand up to your parents and call yourself an “adult”?

Now listen… I know that this doesn’t count for everybody in the world, nothing anybody can write ever will. This is a complete outcry for the stereotypes to change. For opinions of us young adults to be shifted in order to align more with what most of us think of ourselves.

In my experience, the hard times that people in family generations before me had wouldn’t happen now because those very people (the older generations) WOULDN’T LET IT HAPPEN. I am fortunate. Absolutely blessed, to have such a great support network of family who would never let me fall on my face because they would be there to catch me. People have fallen on their face before, been flat broke, had to move out and get a job to pay the bills, because there were no other options!

So we are fortunate, most of us 20-somethings, to have the support networks that we do, with the hardworking families behind us who have all had their struggles. But those struggles don’t exist for most of us. They wouldn’t be struggles that we go through in our 20s because we have different struggles. They might seem trivial to you but this is our reality and it is not trivial to us. Most of us have our sights set on making a change in the world. The hardships will come and the challenges will be faced, for me there have already been quite a few, but sometimes you cannot measure them physically (like being poor/broke).

Navigating this world over the past 4 years of my 20s has been quite the interesting time, I’ve learned so much and I think it’s about time I share because people ought to share these things! So here it goes, what I’ve learned that being a 20-something is like in 2015. (There are 10 so get ready, the 10 Commandments of 20-somethings.)

  • We are SO young. I’ve been thinking about this a lot lately but basically it goes like this… when you are 17/18 you think you’ve conquered it all, the world is yours because you’ve earned it by reaching the ripe old age of 17 and getting your license. You are in college or practically there at least and you know it all. WRONG. Now, at the age of 24, I feel younger than ever! I am realizing how much time I have left to navigate this life and it is so exciting! I have been humbled by age and have realized how much I have yet to learn.
  • We want what everyone else wants, but just not yet. Yesssss we knooooowwww you are supposed to get a good job for the benefits and pensions, and we knowwww you are supposed to get married and have kids to enjoy the real joys of unconditional love and hard work and we KNOWWWW that you think we should do it now while we are young and resilient. But what we see is this…
    • We are young and resilient! NOW is the time to travel the world, to make a change, to learn about different cultures and prepare. Now is the time to gather the experience to prepare ourselves to do those things up there ^. 
  • We love hard and we fail harder. That is what everyone says to do RIGHT? Fail hard and fail fast… this is how you succeed. Well GUESS WHAT? It takes time to do that! So if we appear to be sitting on our bums because everything we try just doesn’t work… it is becauseeee we are working it out!
    • I don’t know a single person around my age who only loves to do one thing and who has only loved one person consistently since they started their 20s. The times of marrying at 18 and doing the same job for the rest of your life are OVER. And going to college doesn’t mean that we just go and do the exact thing we studied for when we graduate at 21 or 22. It means we study stuff that we love and prepare ourselves to dive into whatever is next for us whether it is the thing we studied or something entirely different.
  • We value taking the time to be “selfish”. Back to how we feel about the world… wanting to make a change. Well because of that, there is pressure to be a good person before you can do good. So excuse us if we “feel the need to jet off for a year” to travel, live somewhere else, work a few different jobs, pursue a passion because we want to gain some perspective before we go ahead and jump into the work force. It means a lot more now a days to be an active part of a community and most of us realize that and want to live up to that. Most of us also have no dependents so why not!?
  • We still need our parents. I respect my parents so much, they have taught me so many lessons in my short life and they  are largely responsible for molding me into the person who I am today. But they can only do so much and the rest has been done by me. So yes, we still need you, moms and dads, because we love you and respect you and value your opinions. But please don’t make us feel that we are still kids because we need you and we show it. Whether I’m 24 or 64, I will always value and look for my parents opinions and support. Always. But it doesn’t make me a child. I am still their kid but I am not A kid.
  • We know what people think of us. We have heard what some people think. That we are overgrown children, that we can’t support ourselves and that college is just an excuse to party for an extra 4 years before entering the “real world”. Well all I can say is, stereotypes are given that name for a reason: because they try to categorize a group under a particular mold. ENOUGH of that is what we say. Some of us may fit into some of those names but most of us don’t. We take things seriously and have plans to move forward and make waves in the world. End of.
  • We have no time for “haters”. We are busy trying to figure things out! No time for “you just graduated, why don’t you go and get a good job and settle down?” Zero time for that.
  • We feel overwhelmed, but we are ready. There is SO much to be done! We are so lucky (a majority of us) to be well-educated and have a great structure in our lives with endless opportunities. But the real thing is … where to start? What do I actually want to do?! I’ve been told I can do anything and I now see just how many “anythings” there are in the world. The good news is, throughout these crazy years of the 20s, we get to a point where we feel ready to meet the world and take on the opportunities or challenges that we might not have been sure of when we were a bit younger.
  • We have hearts full of love and minds full of inspiration. I feel so fortunate, and proud even… to talk to my friends and see them doing big things for themselves and caring about other people around them. We all want to inspire and be inspired. There are lots of great ideas coming from the minds of 20-somethings, it just takes a bit of time for us to figure out where we are going with it and how we will get there.
  • We will be the ones who change the face of this planet for the better. Need I say more?

We are not to be underestimated, us 20-somethings. For all of you 20-somethings out there who are looking to be explained to your parents and families without having to try to explain things yourselves… send them this. Let them be inspired by what we’ve got going on and let them see that there is room to grow.

**Please note that everything I’m saying is my personal opinion and is not fact in anyway. I also do not mean to offend anyone or stereotype anyone as these are just my opinions and observations based on my own experience.

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Biggest fear? Water. Where I need to be most? Water.

Makes no sense, I know. You asked though- beach, mountain, forest or somewhere else? Near the water. That is my answer.

Natureeeee I need youuuuuuu, I need to be in nature to feel connected to this crazy world. Is that a “hippie” thing to say? Long hair don’t care is what I say. I guess that all three of those things up there would be near water at some point or another. So any of them would do.

It depends on the season though. Here is my perfect life- this is how I would keep sane in the ideal world where I can be near nature 24/7.

Fall is for the Forest

Winter is for the Sea

Spring is for the Mountains

Summer is for the Beach

Water scares me, but it also frees me and enlightens me. It is the most powerful thing I have ever encountered and I have witnessed first hand the beautiful and horrifying things it can do. Nevertheless I love it. The air is cleaner and crisper when you are near water. Everything looks more beautiful when you are near water.

I have been spending a lot of time lately thinking about stillness in life and how to incorporate it into my daily life more. Being near water allows me to be still because water is always moving, always flowing, never stagnant, so let it flow so that I can be still. It clears my head to do so, thoughts flow through like the water in a stream and then are carried away by that same stream, leaving me with a sense of clarity.

So what do I choose? Water. Always. I aspire to that perfect life up there. Hopefully I’ll be writing long enough to let you know when I achieve it.

Inspired: Daily Post

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Hideaway #hideaway

Sometimes this life can just get to be too much for me. So I write about it. I can’t share all the things I write with you though, because they are intimate in a way. They are a huge part me in the sense that they represent the inner workings of my mind. They are totally not for everybody haha. But even with writing, sometimes this life can just be too much, too too much. So when that happens, I walk.

I just get up and go and I feel this compelling need to be immersed in nature. To go hug a tree. Literally to hug. a. tree. I did it yesterday. It’s thrilling. They reciprocate, trust me. Trees have souls. It was such a great moment to be honest. I just felt like I was really connecting with something, in a way that doesn’t need words. And thank god because that is what I need when the words get to be too much, sometimes the words just get in the way.

Today, however, I didn’t feel better. I felt the same. So off I went again… desperate for a piece of nature. And I found a hideaway. On a college campus of all places. I set off to hit up the studio and choreograph a new piece, but my mind was too heavy. I just couldn’t. So I walked. And I found a gem. Among all these buildings and students, parking lots and people, there was a tiny glimpse of a forest that used to be much larger and more free. This tiny piece of earth that had been left untouched, until I came across the secret hideaway.

I saw it and I thought to myself, maybe I should just sit in there for a while, nobody would even know I was here. Nobody knew where I was anyway, so I decided to leave it because it looked as though it belonged to someone or something else. It had been tagged, seats had been left where warm buns used to sit and it was not mine to occupy. Only mine to appreciate.

It left an imprint on me. What other nooks and crannies has this world got to offer? What else could we see if we could just take a minute to explore and open our eyes to something new?

I need nature. For my sanity. And thank god there are still places where it exists. This world would be a sad sad thing without the raw beauty of things that naturally exist. Thank god for trees. Go hug a tree today, honestly. Over and out.

Check it out: Daily Post 

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As the sun hits your face

Yesterday I went for a walk with my love, we went to this park nearby. I’ve walked through this park about a dozen times, but I’d never explored the top left corner of it so I decided we should walk through there.

It was finally a warm gorgeous sunny day here… haven’t seen one of them in months. For those of you who aren’t aware of Dublin weather… don’t worry about it, it’s not too exciting from about November-March.

The park was beaming with rays of sun and families just living their lives. But there was still a corner for us. You can always find a place to be. That’s what I think anyway. So we found ours ^^ up there you can see. And while we were chillin there I remember thinking about what I had just seen and how the sun hits one’s face.

I saw this and was inspired:

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Look at those faces! The sun hits them and they look like they are looking in different directions. They are all the same! How CLEVER is that? When you look at them from afar, as the sun hits them and you walk along, you can see that they look like they are all facing towards the center, because of the sun. And whichever one you are in front of, regardless of its position in the line of faces, it is always the center face, looking directly at you. So what does that even mean?!

Think about how the sun hits your face. At any given time you could look like a different version of yourself because of the sun. Have you ever had someone say to you, “oh wow you look so gorgeous in this light!” That’s the magic of the sun. It reveals the 50 shades of our personalities. But even if it doesn’t come out, we are still who we are. The sun reveals what remains hidden sometimes without it.

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The other side of each carved face- all inverted, reveals the carved-out version of each face. To me this represents who we are on the outside, who we are on any given day/time without the sun’s rays or lack thereof to shed light/reveal darkness of character.

It just had me thinking. That’s all. As so many simple things in life do. Mostly in nature. There is something to be said about exploring and feeling connected to nature. It feels like being grounded in a sense.